Saturday, January 19, 2008

i am not wat u r thinking

i went around after i have settled my patient
looking for colleague who needed help
but it seems like everybody is quite settled
eventhough the one with the heavy case hav u around
plus i cannot help much either with little experiences in cardiac cases
so i decided to stay in 1st cubicle so that i can sense better if anybody needed my help rather than in my isolation room
then u saw me talking to another colleague
u shouted at me
saying that
eh.. y u all sitting around doing nothing
cardiac room so busy but never go there to help
one new case is coming
so and prepare room 6 for me
u all cannot sit around
must help
.......
i am upset
very upset
without knowing anything and just seeing wat u saw, u make a quite conclusion
without even asking
without even telling us that there is a case coming in advance
and now u blame us for sitting around??!!!
u r too much
.......
i wonder..
does all managers behave like this?
i feel that in nursing, managers know how to take care of pt
but if we r saying welfare for staff and staff management...
they r far bhind the management people
or i must say
they do not know how to value staff
do not know how to treat staff as an individual
do not see that we are all adult worker
not somebody who needs their constant scolding or nagging
or ill treat
.........
that is y i think working oversea open my eyes to another world
i hope to find some place who managers can treat me as an adult
an adult who needs guidance thru my working carreer
who see me as a person who wanted to learn and share with others
that can understand what i want in mt career....
nursing for me is not just a job
but it is a passion that will go on
i need to constantly upgrade myself with new info and more difficult task
but it seems like i hav not been given a chance
mayb i have myself to blame
when my previous manager wanted to send me to oncology adv dip
i turned then down
now i am asking for another chance that will come only years later
but i do not see y they did not send me for short courses that do not need any bonding with hosp
courses like CRRT, LSCN, Oncology workshop, asthma workshop and so forth
mayb i am not in a position to ask anyway
since i am consider still new in the department
but if this kind of incident keep happening,
i do not think that i will be old enough to ask....
hahah....

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